a fare thee well

goodbyes. i hate them.

my technique in dealing with them is to run away from the goodbye as fast as possible. i can't bear the sadness, the when will i, or will i, see you next of it all. you can imagine my displeasure that this week i have to say goodbye to one of my favorite people in brooklyn -- my dance teacher, nicole holst.

when i moved to brooklyn, i knew one person. and while it was exciting, interesting, and enriching, being in a new city and building a life from the ground up, sometimes it wasn't. then i discovered this dance class at my Y.

the first few times i went, i was terrible. i couldn't pick up the choreography. i was constantly a few steps behind. but i left feeling happy and calm in a way that nothing else in brooklyn had done for me.

needless to say, i was hooked.

two years later, that dance class has become like an addictive club, a second family. a great class becomes even greater just by tammy or reggie walking in the door. by being split into the same group with nicole (the other one) or mallory or meghan at the end of class. the times that the class runs over, after we've recorded the video and we dance the routine, please, nicole, just one more time, we loved it so much, are some of my favorite moments in life.

i wish for everyone an activity that makes them feel the way this hip hop class has made me feel. i wish for everyone to meet someone like nicole holst, who takes on life in a way i have never quite witnessed. for nicole, it's not that anything is possible, and i do mean anything - filming a mta rate hike protest with singing and dancing on a subway train, putting together a giant cabaret revue in a renowned brooklyn art space, corralling a bunch of break dancers and friends to record a music video, dancing with a shopping cart, boom box and a rag tag band in the mermaid parade, starting a music career in the time frame it would take a regular person (me) to think that well, maybe, it could be cool, if only.... with nicole, watching her live her life, it's more of an i didn't even know that was possible.

it's not everyday we get to see how we affect other people's lives. sometimes we'll never know. but there is no doubt that nicole brought joy to an endless array of people on a daily basis. it was evident in all the smiles after class.

so thanks, doll.

now pardon me as i run away real quick.