Wednesday, February 12, 2014

the games we play

recently, i was stuck in two tediously boring situations. we've all had these. mine, specifically, were two hours in the middle seat of a hot, crowded car, with a dog on my lap, standing still in tunnel traffic... with a ten year old. the second, was the (un)pleasure of exhibiting magnificent jewels at Sothebys as slush poured from the sky i.e. standing behind a counter for eight hours doing absolutely nothing.

well, almost nothing. in both situations i could have been productive and in Situation A: napped, and Situation B: flushed out ideas for my new novel. instead, i came up with a wide array of ridiculous games to play with my fellow stuck/bored cohorts.

seeing as the whole east coast is about to be dumped on, i thought now might be the time to share the Top 5 Fun Fun Corrie-Made-Up Games. they work in cars, bars (especially in bars), super market lines, and anywhere that you can't bear to be for one more second, yet probably have upwards of thousands more seconds remaining.

let me know how they go. if you have Fun Fun Made-Up Games you like to play, my comments are all ears.

ew. but not in a gross way. idk, that just sounded gross to me.


Game 1. Scenario Face Gestures

you can stop reading right here.

Scenario Face Gestures is my new obsession. the best no-props-necessary game of all time. i've been forcing it on everyone since its inception. with few exceptions - pfft to Ry at my boo's restaurant - it gets huge laughs. "Surprised, but not in a good way. Go!" "Guy walks on the subway and starts his 'Ladies and Gentleman' pitch. Go!" "The couple at the next table at dinner are fighting and the woman just made reference to weiner size. Go!"

seriously. please try this with your loved ones or friends a.s.a.p. it does not disappoint. and it will easily make thirty minutes go buy on a slushy Sothebys afternoon.

Game 2. Three Clue I'm Thinking of Something

i've never had patience for 20 questions. Three Clue I'm Thinking of Something cuts right to the chase.

i'm thinking of a man.
is it my dad?
no. he's tall.
is it my brother?
no. he has a beard.
is it abraham lincoln. 

there. done. next round.

it's the perfect game for our lack of attention span culture. it's even better if you keep score. and Three Clue I'm Thinking of Something is best when there's a dog in the car. what better way to make someone mis-guess their first clue, than by starting with fluffiness?

i'm thinking of something fluffy.
is it Maple?
bzzzz. no.

next round.

i'm thinking of something fluffy.
...(pause) is it Maple?
bzzz. no. 
(sigh of frustration. laughter on my side.)

Three Clue I'm Thinking of Something is not as riotously fun as Scenario Face Gestures, but mindless enough and interesting enough to get you fifty feet further in traffic.

for the record, i do not have a pic of Maple, but i do have a pic of my friend Kev's new puppy, Chevy. and it deserves being shared with the world.

you're welcome.

Game 3. Family Feud

fine this one's an app. but it's free and awesome and i highly suggest you download it. it made the prospect of three more hours at Sothebys bearable knowing we'd play our last Family Feud game in the second hour. (the free version limits how many games you can play per day).

 tho be warned. survey sez for What's in your Picnic Basket? totally whack.

Game 4. Animal Lookalikes

this works best if you're in a semi-crowded work environment, class, or at a big family party. a place where you know the people at least a little, so when you hit on a perfect match, it's pretty hysterical. we could play right now.

rules: choose a random animal.

say, sloth.

now, find the person in the room who looks most like that animal. you have to come to agreement with your fellow players, so let me know what you think.

my beau and i didn't have much luck with this when we went out the other night. maybe it's because there simply weren't any "deer," "bears," or "foxes" at the bar we were at. but i know this game can be killer.

Game 5. The Five Minute Quiet Game

because after all the other ones, Shhhh is the best intro to a game you'll ever hear.

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