Friday, April 1, 2011


this morning i mailed out 4 large checks. they signify the end of my tax season. or rather, just the beginning. because this year i finally learned my lesson and will begin making quarterly payments.

now would be the perfect time to hit me up with a great, legitimate, get rich quick scheme. because this whole working and then giving lots of your money away to the feds thing, isn't so fun.

what is fun? treating yourself to a massage after you finish your taxes.

that's what i did yesterday. it's the first massage i've had in new york city. and only the third one i've had in my life.

it was awesome.

i lay there thinking, it's too bad i had to give all that money to the feds when this woman clearly deserved it more. here's what i learned from my experience.

1. do not wear eye make-up to your massage because it will be left all over the sheet that you're face down on. what isn't left on the sheet, will be left on your face.

2. having a stranger rub your butt is surprisingly amazing.

3. those hot rocks that they put in your hands at one point? they want those back. so when they try to take them back. release them!

the girl and i were giggling through most of the massage because i was such a novice.

"no, no, turn this way, please." "no, no, sit up please." "okay, let go of the rock."

so this will be my new tradition. pay taxes. treat self to massage. and now that i'm paying taxes quarterly.... naw, my cheapness would never be able to justify that. but at least next time i won't go in with my socks on.

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