erasing stuck-iness

last week, i helped 826NYC mail holiday cards to their donors.

i began volunteering at 826 almost as soon as i moved to NYC. Dave Eggers, of this fame (please read immediately if you haven't yet), founded the whole venture in one of the most inspiring examples of what a writer can do with his (or her) fame and (mini) fortune. (second most inspiring? Anne Patchett. you go, girl.)

though i was a pretty dedicated 826 volunteer for a few years running, i fell off after a while, only going in now and then to help with special events. i hadn't realized how long i'd been away until i asked the volunteer coordinator how her wedding planning was going and she said, "i'm about to have my one year anniversary."

oops.

then she asked how i was. what was new with me?

and i said...uh...nothing? feeling very much like this little guy:

okay. i'm ready. let's go. when's something going to happen? hey guys. what about me? i'm waiting!

i wasn't upset about it or anything (so no pep talks needed), but Painted Living Room ain't nearly as exciting as Got Married. though it might be more satisfying. omg, i'm kidding.

then two days ago, a dream possibility presented itself.

remember how much i love Radiolab, that sciency-life-changing show on NPR? well, they put out a call for interns! i applied instantly.

now even on the days that customers at work insist the wine is off (it ain't) because they've stayed on that vineyard so they know, i still can't imagine holding down a full-time job while also being a writer. unless it was for Radiolab the tiny voice in my head always parenthesised for me.

i put together a fresh cover letter and found the most updated version of my resume. and it was whilst doing these two things, that i had this thought: hey, not bad, corrie.

i thought i'd pass the experience along. whether i get the internship or not (fingers crossed) the experience of applying for it was ridiculously gratifying. in fact, it's the point of this whole, meandering post.

feeling like that doggy staring at the door?

update your resume. apply for a job, or an internship, or a volunteer position. not interested in doing any of those things, but still feeling like the only thing that's changed in your life recently was the length of your hair? make a life resume. do the last three years and list all the important or not (hello new carpet!) changes in your life. then revel in the satisfaction of how great you are. because though the day to day can start to seem pretty standard. i bet you anything the big picture's been changing the whole time.