today is simply one of those terrific days. i had a wonderful lunch with a dear friend. little sister is coming to stay with me tomorrow, which means four days of reunited and it feels so good three sister fun. i am head spinning-ly en amor. and i have those nice tingly feelings that maybe good things are on the horizon. today, life feels happily full.
(sheesh. quick. someone knock on wood.)
fittingly, as i cleaned last night in prep for little sis and bro-in-law's arrival, i noticed that my tiny apartment is similarly bursting. as i made my way through my three teensy rooms, i couldn't help notice that every single piece of furniture had at least one drawer that refused to close because there was too much stuff inside/behind it.
the phenomena begins the moment you walk in my front door.
yes, the creepiest, ugliest hallway feeds into my apt.
it gets better once you're inside.
the first thing you see in my apartment is a little, island-thingy that is always popping open due to some bag of chippies or cooking spices.
it's like that old margarine commercial. parkay. butter.
you know....this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ACFO_jtzbfg
and yes, this commercial is much older than me. um. i hope.
which leads to the kitchen where usually both cabinets are popped open, but making a liar out of me, today only one was....
the bathroom's the worst....
our bedroom = so much stuff packed into such a small place that things peep out everywhere (note in the background of this pic, the tub under the bed. that's only one of them). fittingly, my beau's dresser drawer broke recently, because it was too packed with t-shirts. which means a. maybe someone has a t-shirt acquisition problem. ahem. but also b. another open drawer....
and bedside dresser is always ready to spring open.
hi bluie!
why am i sharing this? could it be the three cups of coffee i had at lunch? no! it's that the bursting feeling needs to be shared. whether it's in your life or apartment. we always share the "life feels bleh" emotions with one another. the jobs wearing you down. day to day seems the same. life passes too fast. when the opposite is true, when life is bursting, you, I, best shout it out.
TODAY WAS A GREAT DAY! ALSO PROBABLY IT'S TIME FOR A BIGGER APARTMENT OR A GARAGE SALE!
a few weeks ago, Holly - who organized the gross, eyeball searing, post prom party - and whose ease and happy personality during the affair inspired me to blog about it - this same Holly became my intern.
even with the last post, i tried not to bemoan the youth of today. in general, i don't like generalizations. generally speaking, generalizations are the cause of racism, sexism, bigotry, and premature notions about what kind of writing you do if you write YA novels. no, my novels are not about vampires. seriously people, get past that.
ahem.
so even as i wrote a blog post about wtF! is up with the youth of today, i knew that one horrible post-prom party did not an entire representation of teens everywhere make. (please let that be true and, yes, i chose to word that last sentence thus-ly).
sure enough, a week after Holly's party, we hosted another prom at the club. and it was a prom. girls in gowns. kids holding hands. kids bopping to the music in the hallways. kids taking pictures. and dancing of the kind that isn't forcibly trying to meld pelvis to butt. and okay, maybe there was a tiny bit of puking, but nothing on the level of the first party. and although the whole experience was uber-boring compared to what Holly brought us - oh yawn look, kids acting like kids - it was also soul soothing.
being a YA writer, i couldn't help watching the kids at the grody post prom and think, NO WAY are these kids going to read me. as previously mentioned, my characters barely swear - though sez my agent that's so my novels are lower YA aged appropriate as well - let alone make strippers look tame.
and then Holly came on board at the club and i'm quite happy making this generalization - our youth of today is frickin' impressive. bright, motivated, fun, optimistic. just as we've always been and, aberrations in sexual advancement aside, just as we'll always be.*
* i'm discluding from this statement the bored girl at prom party #2 who said: "this must be even worse for you, serving all these rich white kids. but look around, the kids in this room will be ruling the world one day... or at least New York City."
you chicky? you i'm not a huge fan of.
for everyone else i'm sending out some e-high fives. i know this is not news to anyone who works, lives, plays around, owns or belongs to a teen, but you guys are doing great. keep up the good work. and parents check your kid's wallet for fake id's because if Holly is any indication.... i'm just saying.
when I told Holly what I did outside of my day(night) job, she gasped and said, I'm a YA! and then we talked books, and how much we both loved Fault in Our Stars. and Holly said what every YA author dreams of hearing and a line I wish I could record and send to publishers:
"I'd buy every book you ever wrote."
so to turn it back to a how-everything-in-the-world-relates-to-Corrie conclusion - hey it's my blog -
please may i be published soon?
'cause these kids are growing up fast. and if Holly is any indication, what i'm spinning for them is still totally relevant.
ach. it's no use. my brain is fried. my writing is flat. my inspiration is nil. i almost blew off this blog post, but it's the last one i'll do before the new year. and i can't end the year talking about slacking.
new years -- the equivalent of living simultaneously in the past and future.
does everyone feel the same way right now? a little sad to see the old year passing mixed with a little excited about everything new and fresh that's in store? the weather is even participating. the sky's that exact shade of wintry, crisp nostalgic blue that makes me crave a warm drink and a good hug. (too far, corrie. you've taken the sentimentality too far).
anyway, the other night, fresh off my families visit, i had the urge to clean house. this primarily consisted of dusting and deciding that the box of papers under my bed absolutely needed to be meshed with the box of papers in my closet.
other than proving that sometimes two boxes of papers (especially when you're a writer) are needed, it was an appropriate pre-new years exercise in reflection.
talk about nostalgia? try sorting through a bunch of papers that chronicle the biggest transitional period of your life.
i made this my first year in nyc.
pasted on the inside pages are ticket stubs, letters, photos.
all of them were meant as reminders of the new experiences
i wouldn't have otherwise had if i hadn't chosen to move to nyc.
among the old cards, ticket stubs, folder of rejection letters, i found two separate new years resolution lists. both of them were made when i lived in Buffalo. one from five years back, another about three years ago.
some might as well have been written by a different corrie. present corrie has no strong urge to study at a prestigious school or learn to ski. but a lot more were surprisingly right on.
dance twice a week? check. become a good, confident writer? the fact that i don't even think this is a to-do means, check. it gets deeper. learn to differentiate a well-earned relaxation from procrastination or laziness. check check. (erm, did i mention that it's a tradition on my dad's side to make some pretty hard core resolutions?)
there's one main thing i haven't tackled. but maybe this is my year to get published and go on a book tour for my novel. then i'll be all caught up. which leaves me wondering, who do i want to be five years from now? since it appears i'm pretty good with follow through, and since i've already travelled to someplace i've never been (tho there's always more), currently eat vegetables (nearly) every day, and volunteer at a charitable organization, what's next?
but i guess that's the fun of new years and life in general? you can kinda do whatever you want. i'm happy i found these old resolutions. i often feel like nothing changes in my life, meanwhile the corrie of the past has been progressing into someone she's wanted to be this whole time. the possibilities that await are exciting, yet it still makes me sad to see all the things that were and aren't anymore.
which leads me full blog circle to ask, does everyone feel this way this time of year? and can it please just get to January 1 already so all this damn reflection can end? in the meantime....
Happy New Years everyone! wishing you a fulfilling, awe-inspiring, healthy, successful, and super-frickin' happy 2012.
what better way to kick it off than with a little Zooey (are you watching New Girl yet? it's awesome) and an insanely cute Gordon (guy)...
somewhere in the deep gears of the universe, things are slowly grinding forward. i can feel it. change is afoot. good things are about to happen.
now, i've said this before, after which not much happened. but in the last few days, i've hung with an extremely cool (even though she technically isn't) person. i've watched talent from the sidelines, but been no less awed. and i've witnessed an event that i'm still not sure how to describe, but me being me, i'll try.
first up, if you've followed my blog you know i have a fabulous crit partner named ellen.
what you don't know is that she's a nerd.
no, it's true. i didn't believe it before yesterday, but she proved me wrong. without giving too much away, ellen heard about a tv show that's looking for nerds. she emailed them. a short while later, a casting director called her and asked her to send in a video.
yesterday we made said video.
not only can the girl recite Pi to 50 some numbers (at motormouth speed), but she owns a Lord of the Rings cloak, evenstar necklace, elf pin thingy, and a one ring. i don't want to give too much away (when she's allowed to blog about it, i'll post the video), but after all the filming, after she pulled crazy outfit after crazy outfit from a giant suitcase "this is my ren fair outfit.." "this is my steampunk outfit..." "harry potter..." "vampire goth..." i realized: nerdiness is AWESOME.
not that i hadn't previously know this, but watching ellen perform an entire scene from Princess Bride drove it home. "nerdiness" is a uniquely pursued, thoroughly enjoyed, totally geeky, passion for life. it made me regret all the times i've felt shiftless or bored. why wasn't i watching Red vs Blue, the online video series that's set in Halo? or getting lost in online vampire roll playing games? why wasn't i wearing costumes and going to weird gatherings with other costume clad people?
well, because that's what made Ellen's inner nerd shine. it felt like time to unearth mine.
speaking about passion for life, how better to observe it than by watching someone practice their craft and be really freakin' excellent at it? remember my friend kevin?
kevin's best friend, Sam, is in this acapella competition on NBC called The Sing Off. Sam's group is comprised of solo artists from Nashville. in real life, he's half of the group Sam and Ruby. i saw them live in NYC. the performance floored me.
now, behind the scenes alert, sam didn't want to be on The Sing Off. maybe the world breaks down into two kinds of people, those that would like to be on reality television (go get 'em, crit partner. whoop whoop) and those that wouldn't like to be on reality television (hi sam). but last night after work, i watched sam's group's performances. they're called The Collective on the show. and squeamishness about reality tv or not, their voices need to be heard.
here's Ruby killing it:
here's Sam soloing in the middle. i forgot how much i love his voice:
if only we all had platforms where what we do best is seen and heard. watching sam and ruby bring it on tv made me long for that publication date. for sending out a draft that doesn't come back requiring massive edits. for finally having people read my words and inhabit my stories.
but you know what? it's not all about me. GASP! that's right. i saw it first hand when i wandered down to Zuccotti Park to take a look at the Occupy Wall Street protesters.
i was away when the protest began. my friend read a little bit about it to me from a facebook post. she said, "it looks like a bunch of rich kids who can't get jobs are protesting on wall street." we both scoffed and then went off to have more drinks and tapas. gotta love self-indulgent scoffing.
when i came home, another friend told me she marched with the protesters. she said it was mind blowing, the most important movement and protest to date of our lives so far. huh. i needed to see for myself.
i came away with mixed feelings. on one hand, it is rich kids that can't find jobs:
lobbying to end lobbying.
on the other it is a massive, messy, broadly missioned, energetic collective that isn't happy with the way things work. instead of just privately bellyaching, they're trying to change things. will it work? who knows. but it's grass roots, it's persistent and it's, i hope, for the good of all of us. (yes, i fell pray to that 99% sloganism.)
all three of these events have left me with that butterflies in the stomach feeling. i'm interpreting it as change is a comin'. though maybe the correct read is: corrie, you can make change a come.
either way. it felt terrific to be around these all very different, very inspiring worlds and people.
i went to a cd release party last night. do you remember my good friend Kevin's best friend (got that?) Notar from other blog posts? well, his album drops today.
the release party wasn't at a club. it was at a HUGE loft apartment in the west village.
i love brushing up against NYC lives and lifestyles that are different than mine. it's the equivalent of peeking in through windows and then actually being invited inside and staying for a plate of lasagna. this loft was insane. the chandelier hanging from the ceiling was about the size of my bed (and as all my friends assured me, not from ikea). the owners installed a full bar, and i'm not talking liquor cabinet, a whole deal BAR with mirror, shelves, bar, stools right in the middle of the apartment.
the apartment wasn't overwhelming in it's luxuriousness. it was tasteful, homey and warm.
here, i took a picture:
erm. wait. what's that? oh right. it's part of the bathroom. because who in their right mind would actually take a picture of a beautiful loft apartment when she's in it? not this girl. she takes a picture of the bathroom. and not even a particularly good picture.
sigh.
but anyway, congratulations to Notar and my friend Kevin Augsburg who produced four of the songs on the album. i can't wait to give it a full listen.
on Monday i received an email telling me that Google was taking the ads off my blogs. apparently, there had been too much unlawful clicking.
what can i say? people who love me in Buffalo are really interested in online degrees.
the day i received the email i was bummed. i'd dropped a shift at work so i could write more and this ad money would have been a nice, breath-easier supplement. but as i told a co-worker that night, i wasn't all that surprised.
i never buy lotto tickets. my birthday scratch-offs are always duds. i can never play along with the question "what would you do if you won a million dollars?" because i've always been certain i'd never secure my future through luck. (and apparently not through unlawful clicks either). i've always known the only way i'd get anywhere is through lots of hard work.
or at least hopefully i'd get somewhere. because so far, i was still just here.
later that same evening, something exciting happened. after work, i had a voicemail! (seriously, nothing like working eight hours to glance at your phone and see that nobody thought of you the whole time.) even better than that, the voicemail was from Chelsea at SCBWI. she had some good news.
guess who won the SCBWI 2011 WIP Grant for Contemporary YA Fiction sponsored by Amazon?
MEEEEEEE! i did. this un-photogenic but genuinely happy girl:
does this mean my book is certain to be published? no. does this mean my future is secure? heck no. but it does mean that for the very first time in my writing life, hard work has paid off. and that feels better than a lotto win (okay, lets say better than a small lotto win).
it feels indescribably, take a deep breath, laughing for no reason on the street, smiling like a lunatic at strangers, i've taken a tiny step towards somewhere, GREAT!
so thank you SCBWI. thank you Amazon. thank you unlawful clicker in Buffalo who's been lighting all those candles for months hoping that something nice like this would happen -- ie thank you mama. thank you my amazing crit partner for the fierce thoughtful reads. thank you my sisters for squealing with me. thank you my new awesome writer friend who's gotten me more twitter followers than i've gotten myself. thank you cafe bustello for all the jittery morning fuel you've provided. thank you agent who's been telling me i had a future this whole time. and thank you all my fabulous blog readers and commenters.
hopefully see you all on the publication side.
oh and well, i'll also see you Monday for my regular blog post. and for months and months and months before anything happens with The Secret Keepers.
but until then, since i'm a big believer in giving something back when you get something, come see me on Monday for a book giveaway! a good one. can you say Laini Taylor?
school as an adult rocks! you're not nervous or afraid to look foolish. the class is only once a week. and if you're a bit of a cut up, you can crack jokes and the teacher laughs with - not yells at - you.
it doesn't hurt that my class is in the financial district - a part of NYC that i rarely have a purpose to be in because, well, i'm a writer. money's not really our thing. so i felt important and learned simply stepping out of the subway.
the financial bull is right outside my building.
i immediately felt less learned when i saw all the tourists taking pictures of themselves holding the bull by the, um, lets say, not horns - think opposite end of the animal and rhymes with balls.
but then i took this picture, which i guess makes me not much better than the tourists.
ha ha... see how it looks like the bull's poo...
erhm sorry. school.
i expected the class to be in some crummy, mid-town looking building, but instead it was held here:
it's as pretty on the inside as it is on the out. on my elevator ride up, a woman complimented me on my hat (yay lost and found) and then told me you can tell we're from new york because we wear black in the summer. i was wearing a colorful sundress and white blouse (o-kay-yay).
anyhoo my classmates are friendly and at roughly the same level of spanish comprehension as me.
the teacher is phenomal and is also an artist who's originally from argentina. she conducts the entire class in spanish. sure, i nodded my way through some of it, not getting a word, but shockingly, i understood a lot more.
maybe that's what happens when you take all the pinches out of spanish. (i just wrote a really bad mexican curse word, but since it's in another language and looks like our english word "pinches," it doesn't count).
the class is three hours and it flew by. i happily babbled on in espanol on a multitude of topics like facebook and why Juan Garcia was applying for that photographer's position. the teacher only once commented, "corrie, i have no idea what you're trying to say." which for me is a score! since the boys say that to me at least five times a night at work.
when i left, i felt like the world had shrunk by 80 percent and i could easily conquer whatever part i wanted. i practically skipped home. well first i had a really heavy dinner with my crit partner (who's doing a book giveaway on her blog), so i ended up walking home kinda hunched over. but prior to that, i hadn't felt so free, vibrant, and capable of anything for quite some time.
i've decided that after high school it should be mandatory for everyone to wait tables. and i do mean everyone. there'd be wayyy less terrible customers out there if everyone had tried on those shoes. whilst waiting tables, you get your college like boozing on with shift drinks and drinks after work. not when you have to wake up for exams and 9 am classes. then when you're burnt out serving people, plus trying to recover from being a lush, you're allowed to enroll in an institution of higher ed.
honestly, Mr. Obama, this is a terrific idea.
but until that legislation passes, i think i've found my new calling. continuing ed floozy. 'cause from here on out. i'm going to take EVERYTHING.
i might only be saying that because i'm having my first proper cup of coffee in a week. but so what? you have to say it when you feel it, right? so....
the heat just came on, a banana breads in the oven, i have three days off in a row which i don't plan on being sick for this time, and my writing is progressing swimmingly. right now, life is freakin' great.
this was going to be a blog post about baking. and how now i bake and i never did before and isn't it cool as adults that we continue to grow and learn? then i thought about it.
i bake exactly four things comfortably: bread, banana bread, chocolate chip cookies and apple crumb cake. that cake recipe is a new addition, too. so until about 2 weeks ago, three things.
that's like saying i'm a swimmer when my only stroke is doggy paddle (though you should see my underwater handstand).
but maybe that's the great thing about being an adult. we can say and do whatever we want. you know, barring mean things.
so i'll say it proudly: I BAKE four things!
this week from work i'll acquire that shortbread cookie recipe. that'll put me up to 5. it's a slow start, but visit me when i'm 70 and be prepared to have your socks blown off.
and here, to light up your wednesday, is a fabulous dancing dog video:
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